Industry Representatives Say Talk is Cheap – But We Don’t Even Hear That
UK – With the UK General Election only days away, comments by leaders of the big three parties relevant to the shipping and transport industries are virtually non existent, evasive, or perceived as mere rhetoric by logistics analysts and representatives. The Road Haulage Association (RHA) launched another attack on what many industry watchers feel are merely insubstantial and vague policies.
The RHA point out that the ruling Labour Party position is for what they call “regular real term increases” (why use one adjective when two or three will do) with “tackling road congestion a key Labour priority” whatever that means.
They say the Conservatives will ‘consult’ on the introduction of a ‘Fair Fuel Stabiliser’ that would cut fuel duty when oil prices rise but increase it when they fall. That should be interesting as they give no clear indication what price levels will be set or how they will measure the fluctuations and over what periods. They will also fund new road projects through increased toll schemes.
The Liberal Democrats seem determined to simply avoid virtually any mention of what their targets for the industry are other than to say that “HGV’s will be charged to pay to fund high speed rail links”. Hard to see the connection on that one without any further details. Generally it is accepted that HSR projects are for the benefit of passengers, not freight carriers and yet apparently the Lib Dems seem to think the haulage industry should pay for further tax burdens to fund what is then presumably impractical schemes if left to fund themselves.
As the RHA say to add insult to injury, the party’s plans for re-opening closed rail lines and adding extra tracks will be paid for “by cutting the major roads budget”. Far from confidence-inspiring for the road user.
BIGOT - Street Definition
BROWN IS GONE ON THURSDAY.
Not Premier Browns finest Hour.
The PM is pictured showing his true feelings (for once) after being caught out leaving his microphone on and referring to a lifelong Labour Party supporter as "a bigoted woman".
This trend of obfuscation when it comes to setting out clear manifesto commitments and substituting general statements which are merely sound bites is one of the main reasons there is currently such a lack of confidence in voters across the country.
It would appear that the three main parties are so scared of demonstrating to the electorate just how bad things are, and consequently the draconian measures they will be bound to take to re-correct the economy, whilst falling over themselves in desperation to keep or obtain employment that, whoever one chooses to vote for, you will probably get a Peppa Pig in a poke.
A subject close to the Captain’s heart (and brain) this week.
Much has been made lately, particularly by our American friends, for the need for proper rest periods for interstate freight truck drivers. Many in Europe will look down their noses at this protestation as most trucking organisations seem determined to avoid the imposition of tachographs, the ‘spy in the cab’ found in all EU lorries and which were originally resisted by drivers there.
By using easily forged log books many in Europe believe their cousins out West are missing the point. A tachograph provides incontrovertible evidence of a drivers work pattern. No boss can insist a trucker exceeds working hours regulations, no gung ho, drive all night, lunatic can pop a Benzedrine and fill in a time sheet worthy of Hans Christian Andersen. But sleepy truck drivers cause horrific accidents – lots of them.
There is however one aspect of the drivers rest argument that the Yanks are starting to take seriously.
Sleep Apnoea, an extremely common disorder, particularly amongst those of us over endowed in the waistline department.
A condition particularly prevalent amongst men and even more common when the man is a fat b------d who sits at the wheel of a lorry all day munching anything that isn’t green (with the possible exception of old pizza slices found in the footwell which he convinces himself ‘must be Jalapeno’s’).
Your author and editor was diagnosed with this condition after going a few rounds with a bloke in a long black cloak and an agricultural bent several years ago.
Sleep disorders of this type are now rampant and perhaps now is the time to explain a few facts to those who perhaps feel they are just a minor irritation (formerly guilty m’lud).
The term Apnoea comes from the Greek for breathe therefore it doesn’t need a lot of explaining that literally we are talking here of ‘sleep breath’, or rather we’re not; perhaps it should be called ‘sleep lack of apnoea’. Any road up what happens is you stop breathing; completely. There you are, having a nice kip, and you simply cease respiring.
Now after a while, sometimes quite a while, the brain realises it is about to die and decides to wake you up.
Of course the biggest problem with this scenario is that unless you have sensible Mrs Captain lying next to you all night and giving you a sensitive, caring jab to the ribs every time you decide inhalation has gone out of fashion, you may well not know you even have a problem.
So here are some clues.
If you wake up with a headache like you drank a quart of tequila, dark rum and creosote the night before but in fact you went to bed with a cup of Horlicks, then it’s time to go see the man.
There is usually a questionnaire to complete (at least in the UK) which asks you to rate from 1 -10 how likely you are to fall asleep in certain situations, sitting quietly at home or in a traffic queue, that sort of thing.
If you are a candidate they kit you out with a mini recorder and some Velcro belts and sticky pads and you wear this lot when you get your next nights kip.
After the subsequent computer read out you’ll be told if you have apnoea.
Now let’s get this straight, this is not just about you dozing off in the pm with a book.
It isn’t even about the numerous accidents, many fatal, that occur worldwide every month when truck drivers fall asleep at the wheel, although you might want to think about that.
No, this is just to let you know that what you have is a damn sight more dangerous than you probably know.
When your brain jerks you awake or kicks off that big deep breath in the night when it thinks it’s dying – THAT’S BECAUSE IT IS.
The human body has very little storage capacity for oxygen. Unlike our marine cousins the whales and dolphins after three minutes without oxygen permanent brain damage will occur.
A couple more minutes and it’s goodnight Vienna.
But damage starts to occur even earlier and as your sats (Oxygen saturation levels, not the school test dummy) drop, so brain cells start to shuffle of this mortal coil (they snuff it).
CO2 levels build up and that’s why you end up with a head like one of Keith Moon’s drum kits (God bless him).
Now the good news is that there is no need for anyone living in a civilised country to suffer; even better, there’s no surgery involved and the cure can stop your premature death (and that is what is occurring) in its tracks.
As I say, that’s the good news, obviously different strokes for different folks but generally you’ll end up with a treatment similar to that which your Captain (and the skipper’s wife) have enjoyed (note from Captainess ‘tolerated) for seven years or so.
Usually in cases of apnoea the cure consists of using a breathing aid, a Bi-pap or C-pap machine, which recognises when you stop and simply pumps the requisite amount of air into your lungs before damage occurs.
This means wearing a mask all night and breathing via the machine.
You will look like the ghost of Hans or Lotte Hass or a late entry in the gimp convention (weekend wear section) and you will sound to your partner like Tiger Woods following twelve naked lovelies round the golf course, but you should get a good night’s sleep.
But much, much more importantly, if you’re out driving regularly there is far less chance that you’ll doze off and murder someone.
So, even if our friends in the USA finally decide that 21st century rig technology is for them, if you are a driver of car, van whatever, take a while to check it out if you have any symptoms, you might make a lot of people very happy, without them even knowing.
Pictures (from the top):
They Even Fell Asleep Early last Century,
The Who (just as I remember 'em),
Hans Hass (sans Lotte)
and
Some bloke (not yours truly, that would be too horrible) wearing a C-Pap mask and looking like he's undergoing simultaneous proctology.
This week has seen a rise in publicity for a problem probably going back to the invention of the wheel.
"Sod this, There must be a better way to move rocks pointlessly from one point to another."
“A manageable support and energy transfer system produced using only sustainable and renewable local resources !
Ug. I must think outside the cave for this one.”
.........................
"Have you noticed that since he introduced his transferrable energy system, that blond git sits around all day watching us work, the Neanderthals have all been laid off, and we're moving twice the amount of rocks around pointlessly for his 'Stonehenge Multi Modal Facility'."
Just before Christmas the UNITE union decided a strike over the holidays stranding thousands of passengers would be a good way to put their point across.
They conducted a ballot of all BA cabin crew who decided that this was a good idea and they would all enjoy a nice break at home whilst their customers nibbled cold mince pies on the soulless, cold, tiled floors of airports worldwide far from family and friends.
Luckily for BA travellers the union managed somehow to inadvertently ballot even members who had already opted to accept voluntary redundancy and were therefore ineligible to vote.
The line which the union took on that particular dispute was spectacularly ill judged.
To win public sympathy for a strike requires the cooperation of the media in assessing accurately the demands and complaints of the aggrieved workers.
A précis of how the BA dispute was perceived at the time was simply “We’re going to have to work harder now staff levels are being reduced to those of our competitors”.
As the public’s perception of BA cabin crew was a stunning, uniformed young woman playing with her tightly bound and immaculately coiffured hair whilst pouting and flirting or an effeminate guy plumping up the occasional old ladies pillow between minces this did not inspire swathes of sympathy amongst the travelling public.
This week that strike is back on again with the lesson learned – they won’t strike over Easter.
UNITE expressed outrage again this week when, once more, the Court told them they were acting unlawfully in the matter of the pilot (marine this time) strike at Milford Haven. Now this walk out has been scheduled for next week, one hopes a resolution can be found before then.
The Dublin dockers voted for a full return to work this week thanks in the main to a common sense approach by all parties, including the ITF who were praised by both sides, but now Network Rail supervisors and managers are due to vote on their own labour situation.
They are talking about strikes to include the day of the rugby Union international Scotland versus England at Murrayfield. Thanks lads, you’ll make a lot on inconvenienced old men very unhappy.
Overseas it’s not much rosier.
Take your pick, Lufthansa pilots, Greek dockers, French oil refineries, the South Africans really plan ahead, they have a general strike planned for – October !
In the Philippines they get cute, the shipping companies, oft blamed for killing thousands with their rusty buckets, non existent safety policies, falsified Jackanory style passenger manifests and hapless crews call their threatened stoppage a “holiday”. They must have max Clifford doing their PR.
Fact of the matter is we all know we’re in a slump.
The financial situation dictates that everybody is liable to take a hit in their pocket. Either less money or more work just to stand still. It’s doubly hard when the media either illustrate real cases of unearned wealth and sometimes greed, MP’s expenses, bankers bonuses etc plus often inflated stories which adorn such rags as the Daily Mail and Sun (don’t bother denying it girls, you’ve been sued too often for that).
So those of us who remember the dock strikes of the ‘60’s (Jack Dash, immortalised in cockney rhyming slang and epitaph – All he ever wanted, Was to separate them from their Cash) picket lines of the ‘70’s and the riots of the ‘80’s can put away the rose tinted 3D specs of nostalgia and get ready for the Summer of discontent.
Don’t dare to consider next Winter.
And, in case you're wondering, anyone can go on strike if they feel strongly enough. This photo is of the New York Barbers Union striking in 1913 - dare I say against job cuts?
Just remember self interest generally triumphs over the public good (present company excepted).
Oh, but by the way, if you are a ferry worker employed on the cross channel run next month don’t even dream about striking. I’ve got tickets for France v England at the Parc des Princes and I really, really don’t want to swim there.
Having an office in Thailand means one has to take the occasional trip out there.
Life can be hell, hot weather, sandy beaches, deserted coral islands you know – work.
One of the things one always notices is the somewhat casual attitude to transport. This seems also to go hand in hand with the somewhat casual attitude to life (and death) on the highway.
When one (that means me) fancying a little blog ‘research’ as opposed to work it’s fairly easy to find people who have even more strange methods of getting about than one finds on the average Thai highway where four on a moped is, well, pretty unremarkable.
Now I went to school in the 60’s and I KNOW how many people can get in a mini (it’s 5 less than you can get on a 500cc Sunbeam and sidecar and 6 less than fit on and around a Bond three wheeler if you’re allowed to jump off on roundabouts and only go downhill).
But some of these people take it to a new level.
Now when it comes to trucks, well that’s a different story.
No problem fitting on lots of people, ask any driver who leaves his rig unattended at Calais when en route to Dover, but trucks need to be driven carefully.
A close friend of the Handy Shipping Guide moans constantly about Polish drivers nicking his work. He says he can’t understand how they not only cover it so cheaply but how they can transit so quickly.
I think I may be able to give him a clue.
Now THAT's a bit special!
Driving styles then vary from country to country. Many years ago we used to joke that the desert drivers (Iranians, Australians) were great on their own country roads; just don’t let them into town. It was alleged that nobody dare live on the first corners of a village as one emerged from the Iraqi desert because the truck drivers would knock the walls down so regularly.
I can remember tales of drivers taping cushions to their steering wheels so they could drape their legs through and go to sleep on the endless straight stretches.
Let’s face it, even in a civilised country like the States things must get pretty boring.
Whilst we are in the US and motoring south from Iowa through Missouri and Bill and Hill Country we get to Louisiana and this next vid is like an instructional presentation for Sebastian Coe and his ilk.
The London Olympics loom and with only two years to go we need, as a nation to study how the best of the best do it.
Now Atlanta is in the Southern state of Georgia and provides a template for how to run a Summer Olympics.
What is less well known is that they gleaned their organisational skills from the guys shown here.
You have to sit through a couple of minutes of intro to get the flavour of the, somewhat different, schedule of events, but stick with it, it's worth it.
UK - So, at last, we are out of recession! Wednesday saw street parties and tickertape parades all around the country as the Prime Minister came good on his word and we stormed back into the black.
I strongly suggest overseas readers stop reading here and return to consider a mist inducing set of false memories. Small boys bowling hoops down a country road, gents in bowler hats reading the (proper sized) London Times and giving up seats for ladies, brownies helping old dears across the road and carrying their shopping.
What follows is strictly for home consumption only.
0.1% !!! 0.1%. Who are you kidding Gordon, are you actually serious?
The unelected PM with his unelected Dark Lord scanner controller says he thinks the worst is over. What that tiny, miniscule, ridiculous percentage means is that, in the month we all went mad for Christmas and spent every penny we could, we appeared to stop the plunge into a black financial abyss we have been falling toward for the past two years or more.
Now ask yourself, would you let him look after your kids?
Let alone run a country.
I have to stop now, I need the blood pressure tablets (or I would if I had such things).
.......
Enough, let us lighten the mood and fiddle whilst Rome (or Blighty) burns.
So what else is new?
The despised Blair appeared before the Beak like a nervous, skinny version of the Fat Owl of the Remove.
What’s with the shaking and sweating Tone? And Lord did he shake and sweat.
How many weeks has he kept the wide mouth frog up reciting his answers to the inevitable awkward questions. What a sight that would be, fly on wall etc. Two lawyers cross questioning and answering across the flowery duvet.
“No Tony you idiot you didn’t agree anything on Georges ranch! Do try and pay attention.”
I don’t trust the man but watching him I was minded about the scene from the film of “Clear and Present danger” the Tom Clancy classic when Harrison Ford says to the President in reference to an old colleague murdered whilst drug smuggling “Just tell them he WAS my Friend”.
I was not disappointed, Blair used, I thought, exactly the right tactics (at the enquiry that is , not the war).
Saddam did take part in a war with a million deaths, he did gas thousands of his own people, he did murder 100,000 Kurds.
If he had any WMD’s tucked under the settee believe me, the son of a bitch would have used them given the chance. He didn’t have any BECAUSE he’d used them.
He ignored twelve UN sanctions (so what bloody use are they) so why wouldn’t he just carry on regardless.
So all in all Mr B that’s the very first time I thought you took the right line. So. Why so nervous?
The boss tells me it’s a conspiracy, and she IS normally right.
Get her indoors started about the mysterious death of Dr Kelly and the loathsome A. Campbell, former literary pornographer, and she’ll go off like Old Faithfull with a dose of Montezuma’s Revenge.
So what can we take from this.
Well, politicians are usually a waste of space. Something inherent in our current system is not working. As I remember my History, Britain started, as far back as is worth talking about, with a King as head of state, feudal Lords under him and the “commons” at the bottom.
Move forward a few centuries and we’d demoted the royal blood to the bottom (head to the bottom of an executioners basket in one case) politically, Lords still in the middle, but only with a limited power of veto, and what is laughably known now as the House of Commons actually making the laws.
Now, that’s fine and dandy when you have a basis of honest well intentioned do-gooders in the aforementioned Commons.
We however, have a chamber mostly manned, or at least run by, a bunch of self serving professional politicians. They have whips (they call them whips for Gods sake) to control their “parties” and have their cake and eat it.
Now I’m sorry these are not the common people, half of them wouldn't want to sit at the same table as a "commoner", these guys don’t inhabit the same planet Earth.
In all the “common” places I’ve ever worked a bloke coming up using a combination of promises and blackmail to get you to agree with something you didn’t would normally end the conversation with a degree of embarrassment or possibly a fat lip.
I know it’s a cliché to harp on about the expenses scandal but I think it’s worthwhile “lest we forget” as they say.
These people are thieves. Now I have known many villains in my long and some might say colourful career, but at least, when confronted with the facts, they admitted they were somewhat less than perfect.
This lot can’t even do that, if they can use the “within the rules” defence they will, even when to any observer it was good old fiddling the expenses.
Rory says it better than me.............
Now, I understand, prospective dads are to receive equal rights in paternity leave as their spouses do. If the wife returns to work early, the new dad can have the time off instead.
Don’t get me wrong, if you work for a big group company then fair enough. We do not however all work for big companies. Having heard a (female) spokesman (oops person) for womens rights admit in an interview she would never employ a woman of childbearing age in her small business for obvious reasons, it seems this Government is oblivious once again to reality.
Those of us who have run small businesses with three or four employees know that to lose one to a Government regulation could cripple the firm. Small businesses need separate legislation for all these matters, not a Government so inexperienced in real world commerce that they make up such stupid regulations.
We could be in France!
So that’s the Captains view of the current state of British Politics.
To sum up a disliked and , in many eyes, disgraced former PM, the current incumbent with a lower popularity rating than any of his predecessors (and that’s saying something) being overseen by a pretend aristocrat who has been disgraced three times after a fashion that, in any other age would have seen him banished from public life forever.
A cabinet of ill found jumped up wannabes without the courage to step up, a handful of other disgraced colleagues, the main opposition viewed by many as a schoolboy gang of braying toffs, a second opposition who has one MP who anyone knows and a House of Commons packed to the gills with a plethora of very ‘umble Uriah Heep characters who you wouldn’t sleep in the same room as.
